My 20-year high school reunion is creeping up on me, a constant reminder of how old I am. I don’t remember much about high school – another sign of old age, I guess – but I do remember the lunches. Pizza was always my favorite school lunch option. It was never great pizza (I wouldn’t even call it “good”), and the rectangular shape always confused me, but it was pizza, and when you’re a teenager, that’s all you really need.

Actually, teenagers also need a bunch of fruits and vegetables every day. I recently read in an article that Congress is attempting to classify school pizza as a vegetable. More specifically, they’re trying to count the thin layer of tomato paste on school pizza a serving of vegetables. The USDA disagrees with Congress’s nutritional reasoning, which has created a bit of a food fight between the two groups.

As of this morning, neither side had reached out to me to get The Watermelon Guy’s input on the issue. This oversight on their part is a shame because I’ve got the perfect solution: Get rid of the old school lunchroom pizza and replace it with watermelon pizza. That’s right, watermelon pizza.

There’s a recipe for watermelon pizza on the National Watermelon Promotion Board website. I think it’s a viable alternative to traditional pizza for three main reasons:

1. It’s a healthy option loaded with vitamins and nutrients.

2. It qualifies as a serving of fruit (thanks to the toppings) and as a vegetable (because that’s what watermelon technically is).

3. It looks a lot more like pizza than the current lunchroom pizza.

I’ve forwarded a link to this blog entry to my congressman, the USDA, and my high school’s head lunch lady, Helen. I’ll let you know if any or all of them respond (Helen and I were always close), or if I’m summoned to testify on the matter in front of a Senate subcommittee in the near future.

Who doesn’t love Christmas cookies? I can’t get enough of them. Seriously, there’s not a single kind of cookie I can’t eat a couple dozen of, as long as I’ve also got a tall, cold glass of skim milk (skim’s better for the waistline, you know). All cookies, that is, except maybe sugar cookies. I’ve never understood the appeal of those things. If you’ve got other cookie options, sugar cookies definitely seem like a wasted choice.

Today’s holiday-like recipe is for watermelon cookies. Before you scoff at the notion of making a Christmas cookie shaped like a summertime favorite, I should remind you that watermelon’s color scheme (red, white and green) is a whole lot more holiday-appropriate than most sugar cookies (plain, plain, and plain).

I was going to post the recipe in this entry, but like most made-from-scratch cookie recipes (i.e., the very best kind of cookies), it’s a bit lengthy, so I’ll just link to the recipe instead and post the above photo of the finished product. Enjoy!

BETSY B. WRITES: I am sooooo sad that there are no watermelons in the grocery store now.  I have an addiction to the sweet fruit. Has anyone ever tried freezing it ?  If so, how would you do it ? I have to know. Also, are there sources where you can go to buy watermelons out of season?

And you thought Halloween was the scariest time of year. No, Betsy, the most frightful time of year for watermelon lovers is in … the winter! Muh, hah, hah, hah, hah!

I’m not sure why I’m doing the evil guy laugh, since I’m in the same scary boat as you, but let’s move on by breaking your question down into a few parts. First, the first part (because it’s first). Contrary to popular belief, there are still watermelons in grocery stores throughout the fall and winter. Sure, they’re not sold front-and-center in giant cardboard bins like they were only a few glorious months ago, but if you look hard enough, you’ll find them.

Now to the last part of your question, where you asked about out-of-season watermelon sources. Like I said, you should be able to get your fix at your local grocery store. If you don’t immediately see watermelon when you enter the produce aisle, don’t panic. Flag down a grocery employee or the produce manager (they’ll probably rush to your aid when they see you frantically pacing back and forth next to the rutabagas) and ask if they have some watermelon. If they don’t, calmly ask where in town you might be able find some.

The middle part of your question – about freezing watermelon in an effort to survive the three-month watermelon apocalypse known as winter – gives us the most food for thought. The good news, as we just discussed, is that it’s not actually an apocalypse. But if you’re still interested in freezing watermelon, I ran your idea by the folks at the National Watermelon Promotion Board, and here’s what they had to say about freezing watermelons whole or in chunks: “A watermelon is 92 percent water, so it will definitely freeze, but the defrosting process will ruin the taste, texture, sweetness and consistency.”

So “Operation Subzero” is a no-go, but that only applies to whole or chunked watermelon. I’ve heard of people who freeze it in cubes to use as ice in drinks or to puree later in various smoothies and beverages, but if the freezing process affects the watermelon taste and sweetness, that may or may not be a good idea.

Again, this might be a good “teachable moment” for the produce manager at your local grocery store. When you talk to him or her about where to find watermelon in the winter, run the watermelon freezing question by him and see what he says. Also, if you’d like more info about off-season watermelon consumption, check out this National Watermelon Promotion Board press release and this document with tips for getting watermelon during the winter months.

Good luck, and remember – the start of spring is only 112 days away!

The following was posted previously on What About Watermelon, but it’s a fun entry for this time of year, so I thought I’d repost it. If anyone decides to make a watermelon snowman this year, take a photo and send it to me at watermelonexperts@gmail.com and I’ll post it on the blog.

The National Watermelon Promotion Board website is chock full of cool watermelon resources and activities, but one of the best and most appropriate offerings for this time of year is their instructions for creating a watermelon snowman. Below is a photo and instructions on how to make the snowman.

1. Gather one round seedless watermelon and two personal-sized watermelons (one larger and one smaller), then cut a ¼-inch slice off the bottom of each melon to provide a stable base. Use the smallest melon for the head, the next largest for the torso and the largest for the lower body. Set aside the smallest watermelon.

2. Cut the tops off the large and medium watermelons, as shown, to create bowls. Scoop out the flesh, using an ice cream scoop or large spoon.

3. Taking the smallest watermelon that has not yet been cut, scoop out eyes using a melon baller. Invert melon balls and reinsert.

4. Using a mini-melon baller or a paring knife, scoop out holes for the nose and mouth. Carve a piece of watermelon into a triangle for the nose, and fill the mouth holes with blueberries.

5. Connect all three watermelons on a platter, using large wooden skewers.

6. Insert y-shaped sticks into middle watermelon for arms.

7. Fill bottom sections with fruit salad of melon balls and blueberries. Decorate neck and head with scarf and hat.

I’ve never been the type to go overboard with Christmas decorations, and luckily my wife is the same way. The tree goes up two weeks before the holiday and comes down the day after. No wreath on the door, no robotic Santa and his eight illuminated reindeer in the front yard, no ugly festive ties worn to work.

This month’s prize is kind of festive, though. It’s a watermelon bowl. Those of you with good memories will know that it’s not the first watermelon bowl I’ve given away here on What About Watermelon. I don’t even think it’s the second watermelon bowl, and it certainly won’t be the last one.

Thanks to the bowl’s cheerful holiday red, green, and white color palette (more on that in an entry later this month), this thing can double as seasonal décor for those of us who are lacking in that department. I’ll choose one comment at random from all the comments left on the blog this month to receive this yuletide treasure. Good luck!

I’ve wanted a pet monkey pretty much my entire life. The desire peaked in the mid-1990s when people claimed I looked like David Schwimmer’s character, Ross, from the TV show “Friends.” At the time, Ross had a pet capuchin monkey named Marcel. Marcel was pretty cool.

As I got older I realized how much hard work is involved in raising a primate. There are also the “monkeys shouldn’t be raised as pets” critics. I eventually abandoned my dream, but after watching the impossibly cute pygmy loris monkey nibble on some watermelon in the video below, I think my monkey-owning fantasy is making a comeback.

Of all the doctors Oprah Winfrey helped thrust into the national spotlight who now have successful syndicated daytime television shows, Dr. Oz is probably my favorite (sorry, Dr. Phil).

Of course, I work during the day, so I don’t watch his show often, but I’ve caught a few episodes on my days off and I like his hands-on approach to explaining sometimes complicated medical issues. I also like that he’s a big fan of watermelon.

A few weeks ago, Dr. Oz wrote a short online article about the health benefits of eating watermelon called “Eat Watermelon Year-Round.” In the article, Dr. O (those who know him best are allowed to drop the “z”) lists four reasons how watermelon is “racking up the health points.” Among those reasons is watermelon’s ability to “degunk arteries” and reduce blood pressure while boosting circulation.

Check out the good doctor’s insight for yourself and tune in to watch him in action. To find out which channel to tune to and when to tune it, check out his website. And if you work during the day, you might consider setting your DVR to record his show. Trust me, it’s worth it.

To help celebrate Thanksgiving (November 24), I’ll post a new recipe every Friday in November (including the Friday after Thanksgiving). But these won’t be the usual Thanksgiving recipes. The recipes I’ll be posting are designed to help you out of various Thanksgiving dilemmas – like this one. 

THE DILEMMA: Your eyes were bigger than your guests’ stomachs when you planned your Thanksgiving feast and now your fridge is packed with leftovers. You just had to buy a 35-pound turkey, didn’t you?

THE SOLUTION: The Turkey and Watermelon Sandwich

WHY IT WORKS: Because watermelon is awesome and leftover turkey sandwiches are awesome, which means the day after Thanksgiving is pretty awesome, too.

THE RECIPE: A light dusting of mild chili powder and honey mustard takes sweet watermelon in a whole new direction. This is a sweet and spicy sandwich. (NOTE: The version of this recipe on the National Watermelon Promotion Board website uses thinly sliced pork loin, but turkey works equally well in this case.)

• 1 poppy seed or Kaiser roll, split
• 1 dash honey mustard to taste
• Sliced turkey
• 1 slice watermelon, about 3/4-inch thick and the size of the roll
• 1/2 teaspoon mild chili powder
• 2 ounces fresh baby greens

INSTRUCTIONS: Spread honey mustard liberally over the inside of the roll and layer the turkey over the bottom piece. Sprinkle the watermelon with chili powder and place over the turkey. Top the watermelon with the greens and cover with the roll top.

Tomorrow is a day to give thanks, and not just thanks for your Aunt Frieda’s turkey-roasting skills. I’m talking about real thanks for real things. (Not that moist, succulent turkey isn’t a real thing and you shouldn’t be thankful for it, but you know what I mean.)

Hopefully, you’re thankful to have an amazing family (as I am). You might also be thankful for amazing friends or amazing health. Maybe you’re even thankful for amazing ping-pong skills or amazing hair. Those last two are crossing over into Aunt Frieda’s turkey territory, but that’s okay. My point is, be thankful for something.

I also hope you were able to use at least one of the “Thanksgiving dilemma” recipes posted on the blog this month. Even if you didn’t find yourself facing a dilemma, they might have come in handy. By the way, there’s one more dilemma recipe coming on Friday and it has to do with leftovers, so make sure that you hang onto a little of Aunt Frieda’s turkey. Trust me, you’ll be thankful you did.

The goodies featured above aren’t some sort of watermelon candy or watermelon-shaped ice cream treat (both of which would be awesome) – they’re watermelon cake pops. Allow me to explain.

Cake pops are a relatively new phenomenon in which extra moist cake is molded into various shapes (usually a ball), dipped in some sort of icing and placed on a stick. The cake pops are then proudly displayed and served at various functions, including children’s birthday parties, baby showers, wedding receptions, and “congratulations on your parole” celebrations (in the shape of a ball and chain).

The cake pops above took a little extra effort, no doubt about it. I’m told they’re made with red velvet cake and have miniature chocolate chips inside. To learn how to make your own watermelon cake pops (the boring, round kind), check out this recipe.