THINGS THAT TASTE LIKE WATERMELON: DRUG STORE EDITION

Whenever I’m out shopping, I’m always on the lookout for watermelon-related things. Gum, hats, T-shirts, wallpaper, serving dishes… once you start looking for it, you see watermelon things everywhere. That’s why I’ve created a new monthly entry here on What About Watermelon aptly titled “Things That Taste Like Watermelon.”

For my first Things That Taste Like Watermelon column, here are some drug store items you might find that have been given the taste of one of America’s favorite fruits. I’m not saying these items taste good or that I’ve even tasted them myself, I’m just saying the package makes the claim that it tastes like watermelon. Enjoy!

WATERMELON TOOTHPASTE

Thanks to the good folks at Colgate, the world now has watermelon-flavored toothpaste. Or at least kids do. This is, after all, a children’s toothpaste. We know that because it says so on the package and it tastes like a delicious fruit. Why can’t adult toothpaste taste like delicious fruit? For that matter, why can’t I, as an adult, buy this toothpaste and use it for myself? Other than having to hide when company visited, I don’t see any reason why I can’t!

WATERMELON LIP STUFF

I call this “lip stuff” because I’m not really sure what it is, but I know you’re supposed to put it on your lips. It’s called Lip Smackers and it comes in many flavors, including watermelon. Admittedly, I’m not much a lip stuff kind of guy. I’ll use it from time to time, but it’s only because I found a two-year-old lint-covered tube of it in the pocket of an old winter coat. If I had watermelon-flavored stuff, though, I might use it more often.

WATERMELON PEPTO BISMOL

Here’s another watermelon-flavored medicine cabinet staple made exclusively for children, but instead of liquid form that this is usually in, this product comes in tablets. Seriously, why can’t they make this for adults? Do they think we like the taste of stuff as it already is? I’m going on a serious letter-writing campaign as soon as I post this entry.

Coming up in next month’s edition of Things That Taste Like Watermelon – drinks!